Orange '13 Preconference: "Reaching Tweens: Effectively Ministering to 4th-6th Graders" Notes

Why are we here?

• There is a 5^th Grade crisis.  They are checking out of church because they don’t want to go to “kids” ministry anymore
• It is a Targeted Demographic.  Advertisers are focusing on them because they feel that if they can get them now, they will never lose them.

Tweens: What’s going on in their head? 1. Developmentally Brain Rules and How we Learn

• Wiring.  At age 11, the brain grows exponentially again.  The foundation of who they are going to be made is happening now
• Attention. They need to be able to focus.  The brain pays attention to distinctiveness.  We use previous experiences to impact us.  That is why there needs to be something new to the environment so that they pay attention
• Sensory attention.  Multi-sensory environments always products better results
• Vision trumps all other senses.  When we see something it works better than any of the other sense
• Gender.  How boys and girls approach life is different.  They need to see both perspectives and show them how they can be friends with each other.

2. Socially

1. Less Egotistical and More Relational.  They begin to see life isn’t all about them.  Compromise is important and we need to model that
2. They are Noticing Differences.  They start seeing trends and cliques are developing

3. Emotionally and Spiritually They are realizing life is about tension.  Don’t shelter them from tension. They see God as a magician.  God does these “magical” things, like Gandoff.  They are thinking abstractly. They are asking deeper questions.  Why does this happen? BUT, they are NOT ready for SOME of the answers.  Developmentally, they can’t process it yet.  Help them take baby steps and keep asking them questions. Tweens: What do they like?

1. They love Ownership.  They customize everything and like to create.  Not just “artists” are creating things now.  They make their own movies, etc.
2. Relationships.
   1. Friends matter more.  What are we doing to make sure they are choosing the right friends?
   2. Boys, Girls.  Boys and Girls.  Don’t make assumptions of their interactions based on what you see on TV or stereotypes.
   3. Humor. Funny matters.  A lot of the Top !0 books on the best seller list are humorous.  We need humor.
   4. Pop Culture. Celebrities.  This is the age when they start to understand pop culture and celebrities.  Who is famous and why.  They want to be famous.
   5. Technology
   A few stats: 35% of 9-12 year olds own a cell phone.  Of those, 8% own a smart phone.  Of those, 55% use the internet at home on their phone.  By age 14, those 8% will be 41%
3. They lead a Techno life. They read online, do HW online, communicate (Instagram is the Facebook for 9 year olds), watch TV & Videos and play video games

Leaders: What does this mean for us?

1. 1.    Create Ownership           
   1. Student Leaders (a student who has responsibility and input)
   2. Give them their own space
   3. Have a loose agenda with Kids in Mind.  Don’t worry about the agenda, focus on the kids and those relationships
   4. Create a Safe Place for those Relationships
      1. Kid to himself.  Create a felt need.  They need to know what do with the Bible Story.  Keep asking Self-Reflective questions
      2. Kid to leader.  Elevate the role of small group leaders.  Work on developing outside events that focus on building relationships.  Have fun together with shared experiences
      3. Kid to Kid.  Have Hang Time and Shared experiences with students so that they can be themselves and do good.  Service projects are great for them.
      4. Create a Fun environment
         1. Be Boy focused but girl friendly (no pink rooms).  Girls are more forgiving than boys and girls really just like to talk.  Boys need to do.
         2. Humor is an equalizer
         3. Make it flexible and adaptable.  Use your environment to your advantage.

Finally, don’t rush them to the next stage.  Let them experience a lot during this time and process slowly with them, working with them as they are.]]>